| Celeb Resolutions 2007 Jan 3rd 2012, 11:05 Let's be honest - New Year's resolutions for Hollywood celebrities (and the rest of us) are basically meant to be broken. In the spirit of the holidays, I thought I'd compile a fun little imaginary list of my own. - Make better choices than K-Fed when it comes to men.
- Wear underwear on a daily basis, especially underneath dresses in public.
- Find healthier girlfriends to spend time with other than Lindsay and Paris.
- Finally admit that keeping baby Suri under wraps for so long was mildly suspicious.
- Stop trying to convert friends, co-stars, and exes to the Church of Scientology.
- Keep feet firmly planted on the ground and not on Oprah Winfrey's couch.
- Eat something.
- Eat something.
- Eat something.
- Only hire male nannies to watch the children.
- Do not get back together with Sienna Miller for the twentieth time.
- Find a woman to date with less of a penchant for shacking up with co-stars.
- Get a real job other than just being a party girl.
- Stop pretending to be a born-again virgin who plans to swear off sex for a year.
- Lose the catch phrase, "That’s Hot" since we’re all sick of hearing it by now.
- Adopt a couple more kids and pray that Brad Pitt continues to stick around.
- Make peace with all of the women left in the dust starting with Jennifer Aniston.
- Hope that gay marriage is legalized so that Brad won’t have any excuses not to get married.
- Perform thorough background checks on all future girlfriends.
- Start work on new album to increase cash flow.
- Prepare an iron clad pre-nup to protect $1.5 billion empire from next wife.
- Cut back on the addiction to spray tanning.
- Expand wardrobe beyond jeans and white undershirts.
- Admit that more notoriety came from The Newlyweds than from years spent with 98 Degrees.
- Buy condoms in bulk and actually use them.
- Stop wearing white ribbed tank tops and hire a new wardrobe stylist.
- Get a real job other than just being Britney's ex-husband.
- Get a new agent.
- Cut back on the vampy black eyeliner.
- Find a new plastic surgeon, preferably one with a license to practice medicine in the US.
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